![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kallistiiWell, the secret is out...displayed for everyone who watched tonights episode of Angel. Us male Geeks just don't notice when women "indicate" they are interested in us. Subtle signs don't work. You basically need to lay it on with a 2 x 4 to make sure we get the message. Why?
Today, us guys don't know how to interpret signals...first of all, we don't get raised learning them. So many of us have come from situations where we just didn't have a normal growing up. My dad was an alchoholic, we clashed, I had problems at school because I was too smart, dyslexic and had ADD, then I was drugged up on ritilin until grade 4 or 5. I had gangs go after me when I lived in the Projects area of Caldwell in Ottawa. If not for the shelter of Science Fiction and Fantasy, and it's hopeful message that the future would be better, I might have been just a statistic today.
Most of the male Geeks I know have had some sort of disruptive childhood...be it family problems, illness etc. So we never learned the "language" of how the female gender tries to communicate with us about things sexual. Personally, I know I miss a lot of things...but too much of my life has been spent on survival...Will my job continue? Will I be able to jump through the hoops t hat UI and/or Welfare wants me to jump through? Will I have enough for food this month? How long can I continue to afford the rent/electricity/phone/internet? Can I afford the medicine? And which am I willing to give up a little of to be able to escape for a few hours in a book that I really shouldn't buy, but still gives me the hope to carry on?
So in all this, how am I going to learn that (if this episode of Angel is correct) that if a woman always dresses a certain way when we meet that she is interested in me? Yes the urge to reproduce is strong...but survival tends to trump reproduction, at least in the short run. Tonights Angel was all about that, how the Werewolf Chick was signaling to Angel that she was sexually interested in him, how geekchick Fred had to forcefully kiss Wesley to get him to notice that she was interesed in him. And the last sexual experience I had, I practically had a 2x4 laid across my temple...
I am guessing that probably Joss Whedon is a geek. This episode was written and directed by him.
So, here I sit on the eve of my birthday, and wonder If I will ever know that other langauge...I hope so, since I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life...and a really do hope that I may find somewhere that I have some semblance of a place and a time where I can build something that would last at least two people for a while...
ttyl
Today, us guys don't know how to interpret signals...first of all, we don't get raised learning them. So many of us have come from situations where we just didn't have a normal growing up. My dad was an alchoholic, we clashed, I had problems at school because I was too smart, dyslexic and had ADD, then I was drugged up on ritilin until grade 4 or 5. I had gangs go after me when I lived in the Projects area of Caldwell in Ottawa. If not for the shelter of Science Fiction and Fantasy, and it's hopeful message that the future would be better, I might have been just a statistic today.
Most of the male Geeks I know have had some sort of disruptive childhood...be it family problems, illness etc. So we never learned the "language" of how the female gender tries to communicate with us about things sexual. Personally, I know I miss a lot of things...but too much of my life has been spent on survival...Will my job continue? Will I be able to jump through the hoops t hat UI and/or Welfare wants me to jump through? Will I have enough for food this month? How long can I continue to afford the rent/electricity/phone/internet? Can I afford the medicine? And which am I willing to give up a little of to be able to escape for a few hours in a book that I really shouldn't buy, but still gives me the hope to carry on?
So in all this, how am I going to learn that (if this episode of Angel is correct) that if a woman always dresses a certain way when we meet that she is interested in me? Yes the urge to reproduce is strong...but survival tends to trump reproduction, at least in the short run. Tonights Angel was all about that, how the Werewolf Chick was signaling to Angel that she was sexually interested in him, how geekchick Fred had to forcefully kiss Wesley to get him to notice that she was interesed in him. And the last sexual experience I had, I practically had a 2x4 laid across my temple...
I am guessing that probably Joss Whedon is a geek. This episode was written and directed by him.
So, here I sit on the eve of my birthday, and wonder If I will ever know that other langauge...I hope so, since I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life...and a really do hope that I may find somewhere that I have some semblance of a place and a time where I can build something that would last at least two people for a while...
ttyl
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Wow...
Date: 2004-02-19 05:49 am (UTC)From experience, I can say that the first thing you need to do (forgive me sounding like a self-help book) is work on your self-esteem. Love yourself for who you are, be proud of yourself and what you can do, and when you are, it will show and attract others.
It wasn't till I went through a string of horrid relationships and given up totally on men to focus on my own life that I met the man who was to be my husband for 7 years now. :)
Be strong, be well...things will come together. ;)
Big hugs! >==^_^==
Re: Wow...
Date: 2004-02-19 08:46 pm (UTC)I am usually not so depressed, but birthdays just kinda get to me.
ttyl
Re: Wow...
Date: 2004-02-20 04:32 am (UTC)Hope you are feeling better. :)
Re: Wow...
Date: 2004-02-21 09:18 am (UTC)ttyl
Re: Wow...
Date: 2004-02-23 04:46 am (UTC)Hope you have better luck than me! ;)
Happy Birthday!!!
Date: 2004-02-19 06:14 am (UTC)I hope that you have a lovely birthday.
As far as human mating rituals go - just stick to it. Persistance pays off, even amongst the geekiest. Really, really.
Re: Happy Birthday!!!
Date: 2004-02-19 08:52 pm (UTC)ttyl
Happy BirfDaze!!!
Date: 2004-02-19 07:41 am (UTC)grins
yer always welcome here. grins. happy brithday [argh cant type like]
Re: Happy BirfDaze!!!
Date: 2004-02-19 08:54 pm (UTC)I need to talk to you a bit about ftp+SSL, I don't like the protocol, since it is a kludge, and my gut feeling is that it is not secure.
ttyl
no subject
Date: 2004-02-19 10:26 am (UTC)OMG you seem to have read my mind. And if you ever do ever figure it out, be sure to let the rest of us know (or at least just me). :P
RF
Re:
Date: 2004-02-19 08:55 pm (UTC)ttyl